you can't forget the past in fear of the future

Ok...so it's quite obvious now that blogging is most probably NOT my thing...but i'll kepp trying!
Sooo news... well quite a lot is going on a school recently. Last night we had our year 11 info evening...ARGH I DON"T KNOW WHAT I'M GOING TO DO MY WHOLE LIFE IS RUINED! (lol see how LIGHT they make it seem??)
FAR OUT someone (cough who shall remain nameless) came up to me today and asked me if i like this guy...ok and now im getting embarassed cos she was liek the third person to ask me! Am i sending out vibes or something? SHEESH KABOB. I just realised that this looks like a cheap American cheerleaders dairy. HELP ME!LOL
anyways...i was just reading through an email that Meagan sent out and it was sooo beautiful..."you can't forget the past in fear of the future".
Wait now i think about it i think i'm doing the opposite...I'm dwelling TOO much on the past and it's stopping me from moving on to the future. And quite frankly i'm sick of it.
This morning i decided that i hate happy dreams. why? because they lie to you and tell you things that are unbeleivable and happy and NEVER going to happen. Ok so i'd rather have happy lieing dreams than ETCH nightmares but still... the dream i had last night made me so happy but then as soon as i woke up i started thinking...and then i got devo cos i know that it aint gonna happen.
Am i totally strange? oh well...as i always say "I am one strange cookie"
ciao